MOCKINGBIRD

Okej, jag skrev om Toby Keith igår och det känns som att jag måste knyta ihop den säcken. Toby Keith är den störste patrioten inom countrymusiken. Han är en Oklahoma native, började som oljeriggsarbetare och när där inte längre fanns sysselsättning spelade han semi-professionell amerikansk fotboll under en period innan han hittade in i musikbranschen.
Men nog om det. Jag vill bara lista de bästa låtarna. Vilket inte är helt lätt, men jag har gått efter den gamla ståpälsmetoden som min pappa lärde mig redan i vaggan. Som helt enkelt handlar om i vilken utsträckning håren på armarna reser sig.
Listan är utan inbördes ordning.

You shouldn't kiss me like this
-den som nånsin blivit kyss på rätt sätt av fel person kan inte annat än att tycka mycket om den här
There's a different feel about you tonight
got me thinking lots of crazy things
I even think I saw a flash of light
felt like electricity
You shouldn't kiss me like this
unless you mean like that
cuz I'll just close my eyes
and I won't know where I'm at
when you kiss me like this
I think you mean it like that
if you do, baby kiss me again


I'm just talkin' about tonight
- en rätt och riktigt ärlig one night stand-låt
Well, I'm not talkin bout locking down forever, baby
That would be too demanding
I'm just talkin bout two lonely people
who might reach a little understanding
I'm not talkin bout knocking out heaven
with whether we're wrong or we're right
I'm not talkin bout hooking up and hanging out
I'm just talkin bout tonight

I wanna talk about me
-som tjej borde man kanske inte gilla den här...
We talk about your work, how your boss is a jerk
We talk about your Church and your head when it hurts
We talk about the troubles you've been having with your brother
About your daddy and your mother and your crazy ex lover
We talk about your friends and the places that you've been
We talk about your skin and the dimples on your chin
The polish on your toes and the run in your hose
And God knows we're gonna talk about your clothes
You know talking about you makes me smile
But every once in a while I wanna talk about me
Wanna talk about I Wanna talk about number one
Oh my, me, mine
What I think, what I like, what I know, what I want, what I see
I like talking about you, you, you, you, usually but occasionally
I wanna talk about me

How do you like me now?!
-in-your-face-jag-är-framgångsrik-nu-låten
I was always the crazy one
I broke into the stadium
And I wrote your number on the 50 yard line
You were always the perfect one
And the valadictorian so
Under your number I wrote "call for a good time"
I only wanted to catch your attention
But you overlooked me somehow
Besides you had too many boyfriends to mention
And I played my guitar too loud
How do you like me now?
How do you like me now, Now that I'm on my way?
Do you still think I'm crazy
Standin here today?
I couldnt make you love me
But I always dreamed about
living in your radio
How do you like me now?

I love this bar
-redneck-bar-romantiserande. I kvadrat. Fast man längtar ju lite dit. Plus att frickin' silja line har trashat den här låten i någon av sina reklamfilmer.
We got winners, we got losers
Chain smokers and boozers
And we got yuppies, we got bikers
We got thirsty hitchhikers
And the girls next door dress up like movie stars
I love this bar
We got cowboys, we got truckers
Broken-hearted fools and suckers
And we got hustlers, we got fighters
Early birds and all-nighters
And the veterans talk about their battle scars

I love this bar
It's my kind of place
Just walkin' through the front door
Puts a big smile on my face
It ain't too far, come as you are
I love this bar

Stays in Mexico
-om hur utomlands är... utomlands
Don't bite off more than you can chew
There's things down here the devil himself wouldn't do
Just remember when you let it all go
What happens down in Mexico
Stays in Mexico
He woke up in the morning and he made a little telephone call
To check on his wife and his kids back at home in Sioux Falls
She hopped right in the shower with a heavy heavy mind
He knew it was the first time Gina had ever crossed that line
They walked down to the beach and started drinking again
Jumped into the ocean for a dirty swim
One more margarita they we're falling in love
One more is never enough!

As good as I once was
- jag kan känslan, att bli äldre och inse sina begränsningar
She said, "I'v seen you in here before
"I said, "I've been here a time or two"
She said, "Hello, my name is Bobby Jo
Meet my twin sister Betty Lou
And we're both feeling kinda wild tonight
And you're the only cowboy in this place
And if you're up for a rodeo
We'll put a big Texas smile on your face"
I said, "Girls,"
I ain't as good as I once wasI
got a few years on me now
But there was a time back in my prime
When I could really lay it down
And if you need some love tonight
Then I might have just enough
I ain't as good as I once was
But I'm as good once as I ever was

The Taliban song
- så var det där med patriotismen som nästan går till överhand. Den här låten är lika otäck som den är rolig. Egentligen. Men jag tycker att ni ska lyssna på den. Bara för att få höra killen som så hjärtligt doar, "Ooooh, the taliban, baby"
"I'm just a middle-aged, middle-eastern camel herdin' man
I got a little, 2 bedroom cave here in North Afghanistan
Things used to be real nice and they got out of hand
when they moved in
They call themselves the Taliban

Now I ain't seen my wife's face since they came here
They make her wear a scarf over her head that covers her from ear to ear
She loves the desert and the hot white sand
But man she's just like me, nah she can't stand
The Taliban
You know someday soon we're both gonna saddle up and it'll be
Ride Camel Ride
My old lady she'll be here with me, smilin right by my side
We should do just fine out around Palestine or maybe Turkmenistan
We'll bid a fair adieu and flip the finger to the Taliban
(I know where you comin from brother!
This is a patriotic love song
So y'all feel free to salute if you want,
You got my permission)
Now they attacked New York City cause they thought they could win
Said they would, stand and fight until the very bloody end
Mr Bush got on the phone with Iraq and Iran and said
"Now, you sons-of-bitches you better not be doin any business with the taliban"
So we prayed to Allah with all of our might
Until those big U.S. jets came flyin one night
They dropped little bombs all over their holy land
And man you should have seen em run like rabbits, they ran
The taliban

Ibland tar jag sånt här på alldeles för stort allvar. Och det här har tagit alldeles för lång tid. Nu måste jag styra upp det här ansiktet. Åka och handla. Det ska bli grillstäming här idag.